Tag: perspective

Getting Corrective Lenses

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Hello, my name is Wes, and I wear corrective lenses.

One of the most disheartening things when it comes to my vision weakness is watching as people with perfect eyesight (let’s call them “snobs”) try on my glasses and inevitably say “wow, you’re blind!”

I was told a while back that my astigmatism combined with my strong prescription meant contacts were not an option. Thankfully, there have been some advancements, and as of last week I have a pair of contacts. But the process was not a simple one.

My eye doctor told me we basically had two options. He could modify my prescription just a little bit and try a cheaper route, or they could custom order me a pair that should work great. I opted for the cheaper route to start, and the result was lacking.

When I tried on the first pair, I slowly began to realize something. I could not focus out of my right eye. As I looked at the eye chart, I saw three outlines of each letter, regardless of the size. It was actually quite fascinating. I think I may have been able to see more clearly out of my uncorrected eye! So, we decided to try a different route.

Leadership is very similar. Sometimes you have to try something, only to realize the lens through which you’re looking only clouds the issues more.

I use the language of looking through situations with a leadership lens very often. I think so many times the issues we face and the struggles we encounter happen because we have the wrong lens in front of our eyes.

When we get the right leadership lens, we begin to see:

A challenge is an opportunity.

A mistake is a lesson learned.

A difficult person actually brings a lot to the table.

A subtraction is sometimes an addition, or vice versa.

How do you adjust your lenses? Read some leadership books (I don’t know how I made it in ministry almost 16 years before actually reading this one!). Find some leadership podcasts to listen to. Subscribe to Audible and start listening to audiobooks. Check with your local library to see if you have access to check out ebooks or audiobooks at no charge to you. Read leadership blogs (like 3QL or Carey Nieuwhof).

Whatever you do, be intentional about it. Growth rarely happens on accident. I never wake up with glasses on my head or contacts in my eye. I have to make the decision that I want to see clearly today. Do the same for your leadership.

Naming Leadership

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My oldest daughter turns 12 tomorrow. When she was younger, she had imaginary friends. Each friend had a name, none of which I can remember. But the name made them personal.

Hang with me for a minute. If you have children, or have ever been one, then you know the power that comes from giving something a name.

We name our stuffed animals. We name our cars (at my former church, “Bertha” was our temperamental van). We name our guitars. Well, you may not have guitars, but I name my guitars and those of other people (shout out to Tay Tay).

There’s an affection that comes from naming them. There’s a sense of pride and ownership. There’s a sense of power.

But at the end of the day, the stuffed animal is a stuffed animal. The guitar is a guitar. The car is a car. The name does nothing to change the fundamental existence. It makes us feel better or more connected, but it does not change the core.

Leadership is the same way. We can give someone the name of leader, but does that truly change who they are at the core?

I see it time and again in student ministry and in watching people who work with students. They wait for students to show a sign of achievement before bestowing the name of leader. Students lift the renaming up as part of their goal–some target to aim for or strive towards. Once they “become a leader”, then they will step up and lead.

What if this approach misses the point completely? What if I am a leader regardless of whether or not I have the title?

What if I am not searching for someone to give a new name, but instead for someone who already doing what leaders do?

I have said this before, and I will repeat it until I stop breathing or am shown that I’m wrong: leadership doesn’t show up because of a title. You can influence people around you regardless of your place on the org chart. You don’t need a title or a position to exert influence. You need a mindset.

I regularly talk with students about “making the room better.” I want them to walk into a room and it to be a better place because they are there, regardless of their title.

This is what I strive for. I don’t have to be up front to accomplish this. I don’t have to touch every life in the room to accomplish this. But I have to be consistent.

Stop waiting for a title to come your way to lead. Grow your influence.

Stop waiting to bestow a title on a student who is worthy. Throw the title away and help them grow their influence.

Then, at some point down the road, you and they will look up and realize you, and they, are making the room better.

Pass the Shovel

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Have you ever been asked to dig a hole and not been given the proper tool to accomplish the task?

A few years ago I took a group of kids on a mission trip. The group I had proved a little more efficient than the host anticipated, so we started working on random projects around the property. One of the projects was digging holes for a future gate.

Now, growing up on the farm, I’ve had my share of digging holes. We used tractors, post hole diggers, and shovels to accomplish the necessary task at hand. But, I had never experienced having to dig a hole like this.

The ground below the top soil was almost solid rock. So, for the first time in my life, I learned to use a digging bar.

A digging bar, to jazz it up, is a metal spear that chips rock away bit by bit. And it’s work.

Each person in our group would take turns, about 10-20 strikes per person, trying to chip away at the rock. Then, after we had made some progress, someone would swoop in and clean out as much debris as possible. Lather, rinse, repeat.

The funny thing is this: the owner of the property didn’t look at me and say “you have great hole digging potential” and walk away. Instead, he walked us out, gave us the tools we needed, demonstrated what it looked like, and let us get to work.

Developing student leaders is very similar. A lot of people will tell a student “you have leadership potential”, but are we walking away or putting a digging bar in their hands?

If we want to develop student leaders, then our job is not complete at recognizing ability. We need to equip them to step up and lead. We need to find the shovel, post hole diggers, and digging bars necessary to help them grow and accomplish the task.

How do we do that? I’m glad you asked. Go here to read about three questions I’ve developed to help put a shovel in the hands of a student. My desire is not to simply acknowledge someone’s potential, but to give them the opportunity to serve.

As we teach students to lead using the three questions, we are providing them with the opportunity to grow and to come to know understand leadership more clearly. The three questions are definitely not the end game, but they sure do open the door for further conversation.

And who knows, as we teach ourselves to pass the shovel, maybe we will grow as leaders along the way, too.

Understand Your Impact

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Leadership so often boils down to the impact we make.

Think about someone in your life who has had a leadership influence on you. How would you describe their leadership?

The number of books they read?

The size of their house?

The way they made you feel?

The way they made others feel?

Each of those things, in their own way, reveal the impact they had. Some, more than others.

I think some of the best leaders are not necessarily people who set out to be great leaders, but those who set out to be faithful.

What if our greatest impact as leaders is not because of any program we adopt or implement? What if our greatest impact as leaders occurs because we choose to be faithful to our calling?

Let me rephrase.

Our greatest impact as leaders does not come because of a program we adopt or implement. Our greatest impact as leaders occurs because we choose to be faithful to our calling.

How are you being faithful today?

Tim Elmore has a habitude called the Starving Baker. The idea is simple: a baker who neglects his own hunger in order to bake more will eventually die of starvation. Seems brutal, right? But does that mean it’s not true?

Invest in someone today–yourself. Take a 30 minute silent walk. Pick up a book you’ve been wanting to read but just haven’t made the time for. Listen to a podcast that nourishes you. Listen to some classical music, or some classic rock.

Ultimately, at the end of the day, if our desire is to impact others for the long haul, we have to remain emotionally and spiritually healthy.

Take a moment to eat some of your bread, baker.

Reframing Student Leadership

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I saw a youth ministry related facebook post the other day asking how the collective hive mind selects student leaders. I think this is an extremely legitimate question, but one that needs a quick reframing.

Let me start by zooming out. The bottom line when it comes to leadership development is that I am not the only person interested in developing students into growing leaders. In fact, depending on their extracurricular activities, I may be one of multiple people interested in helping them expand their leadership influence.

As we zoom in, however, we start to see a few key differences. Of all the people in a student’s life who want them to grow as a leader, I may be one of a select few who are interested in teaching servant leadership, and more specifically, servant leadership as modeled and taught by Jesus.

So, when I look at a room of students and want to select a few student leaders, my approach is a little different. I have written about two key traits for student leaders previously (you can read that here), but one of my criteria is willingness to serve. If a student is unwilling to serve, then neither of us grow from the time we spend.

I watched this play out first hand. I used to think if I saw leadership potential in a student, they would benefit from me calling it out of them. But there was a flaw in my approach. I was calling something out of a student who wasn’t willing to serve, and as a result their commitment level was abnormally low, and even started to resent me for expecting them to show up.

Now I take a different approach. Most recently, I have students fill out an application and sit down for an interview before joining the leadership team. If a student is willing to put forth the effort of filling out an application and scheduling an interview, then we have an agreement there will be a time commitment to what they’re doing.

I cannot call something out of someone who is unwilling to grow.

Guilting a student into leadership misses the point.

Only allowing the popular kids to lead misses the point.

Establishing leadership as a higher rung misses the point.

On Thursday I will continue this thought, but for today let me ask you to join me in considering this: is your approach to developing leaders around you a healthy one? Are you willing to make the changes necessary? Are you willing to keep what needs to be kept?

Watching leaders grow their leadership influence is one of the most exciting parts of what I do. But that doesn’t mean everything is a win. I have had to adapt over the years. Maybe you need to do the same thing.

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