Lessons from the Big Chair: Communicate Well

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The church where I serve has been without a pastor since January, and I have had the privilege of serving alongside an incredibly wise, discerning, and experienced interim pastor over the past four months. As that time has drawn to an end and we have a new pastor coming in a few weeks, I thought I would spend some time reflecting on a few lessons I learned along the way. Today will be the last post in this series.

It’s really hard to narrow down some of the major lessons I’ve learned, while at the same time trying to keep situations general. Let me finish the series with the final piece of advice he gave me as he left: keep the lines of communication open.

So many leadership struggles happen as a result of poor communication. I find myself referring to people as “black holes of information” whereas just this week my loving wife accused me of the being the same thing.

Communication can be hard.

While communicating, intent can get ignored.

Content can get confused.

Comments can get misunderstood, and tensions can rise.

That’s why, as leaders, we need to learn to continually keep the lines of communication open, going both ways. We need to communicate well with those we lead, but we also need to be willing to listen and establish a culture of two-way communication.

So, how are you doing at communicating this week? Do you need to work out a situation with someone in a supervisory role above you? What about someone you are leading who may need to communicate with you? What are you doing to help them find opportunities to communicate with you?

Or maybe, for you, communicating means simply checking in and asking how life’s going. Whatever it looks like, keep the lines of communication open and watch your leadership influence grow.

Check It Out: Big Change Takes Time to Chew

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One thing I’ve learned over the years is just because I’ve spent hours thinking about a change, I cannot expect those I lead to have done the same thing.

Click over and give it a read.

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Lessons from the Big Chair: Listen to Your Elders

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The church where I serve has been without a pastor since January, and I have had the privilege of serving alongside an incredibly wise, discerning, and experienced interim pastor over the past four months. As that time has drawn to an end and we have a new pastor coming in a few weeks, I thought I would spend some time reflecting on a few lessons I learned along the way.

Have you ever felt like you were the young gun in the room, and as a result felt under-prepared? Have you ever felt overwhelmed at the knowledge other people in your field know?

Early on in our interim’s tenure, he shared a story with me about something he learned early in his ministry–a 20 something can have the wisdom of a 60 something simply by asking a 60 something to share their wisdom.

In other words, if you’re young, ask older people for guidance.

One of the things I enjoyed the most was walking into the interim’s office and sitting as he shared stories of his experiences: stories of humbling events, incredible relationship, and life change. Very few times did I sit knee to knee with him and not feel energized by his wisdom and experiences.

There is a natural humility in asking people for advice and to share their experiences from lessons learned. Learn from the paths others have walked, and your path will suddenly seem less treacherous.

Now, for just a moment, let me offer a counter-view: if you’re, ahem, older, do not be afraid of sharing your experiences with those who are younger than you.

Please do not begin sharing your experiences by referencing a “young whippersnapper” or “you kids”, and be very cautious of offering your experiences until you’ve been asked. If my generation has any sense, we will ask. Then, you have the freedom to unload your learnings.

One last thought: I love hearing the stories of other people, especially their leadership stories. Hearing stories and understanding why people are at the place where they are energizes me and helps me become a stronger person and minister.

So, once again, you young whipper-snappers, listen to those who are older than you–they are even wiser than you, if you can believe it.

Now, you more experienced generation, please share with us what you learned along the way–we will be better for it.

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Lessons from the Big Chair: Work with People

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The church where I serve has been without a pastor since January, and I have had the privilege of serving alongside an incredibly wise, discerning, and experienced interim pastor over the past four months. As that time has drawn to an end and we have a new pastor coming in a few weeks, I thought I would spend some time reflecting on a few lessons I learned along the way.

First, something we covered regularly, was at the end of the day all we have left to work with are people.

Understanding the reality of this statement is imperative for leaders. We are not working with robots, cattle, kittens, or cookie dough. We are working with people with individual and unique personalities, preferences, opinions, strengths and weaknesses.

For a minister, this means leading a group of people is never the same experience. Every meeting, every service, every event, has a unique feel and energy because the people who are present is constantly different.

For a leader, this means get to know those you lead. Learn what makes them tick, what makes them happy, and what makes them upset. Take some time jotting down a few personal observations about how they respond.

If someone seems to always respond in the negative, learn how to lead them to a positive reaction by anticipating their negativity.

If someone values being included in a decision, find ways to include them in other decisions.

If someone brags on a written note they received from you, write more notes to them.

At the end of the day, all we have to work with are people. Make the most of the effort you spend and get to know the people you lead and serve.

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