Category: Big Picture

The Conductor

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I’m going to deviate today. Thank you for indulging me.

If you’ve been around here very long you know that I value very highly my farming heritage. I have shared close to 30 lessons from the farm along the way.

The reality is I was fortunate to not only have a father in the ag industry, but a heritage of it. Both sets of grandparents lived (and worked) agricultural lives.

That meant holidays were spent more often than not in the country. Summer trips at my grandparents were a staple of my childhood, and something that now I am incredibly grateful to have experienced.

One of my favorite memories, and one I couldn’t wait to share with my daughters as they grew older, was going to my paternal grandparents. Hot cocoa, grilling over charcoal, German shepherds, Louis L’Amour books, vintage couches, hot tubs, feeding cattle off the tailgates, and unwanted (and unwarranted) naps merely scratch the surface in summarizing my favorite memories at “the ranch”.

Except for the best memory. And that was the trains.

My granddad loved model trains. He loved them so much, in fact, that he had a “layout” that took up a two car garage. (Side note: I don’t know if “layout” is the right word, but it was basically the world created by his trains, complete with buildings, cars, mountains, carnivals, railyards, cattle, trucks, forrests, and rubber roads. This wasn’t a train running a circle around a tree. It was massive.)

And to any young boy growing up, trains are a magical experience. The roar of the engine running until the power stops. The aroma of electricity surging through the miniature machines (Yes, electricity has a smell, and it’s not toast). The sheer imagination of towns coming to life, and the hours on end that could be spent getting lost in a world so different from our own.

And there stood my granddad. The conductor. The orchestrator of it all. It never occurred to me that my granddad loved to play with trains. They were just there. He was the one in charge. But he was the one who loved to share the experience with me. It was a shared experience for us. It was one of the first things I showed my oldest the first time we visited his house. And something my girls still know about him.

The conductor passed away this week. As I sit and reflect on my memories of him, I’m humbled. I’m overcome with emotions. I’m heartbroken. I’m grateful.

He was not a perfect man. No one is. But he was my granddad. And he will be missed.

Happy 365

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This post is my 365th post on Three Question Leadership. I have written somewhere north of 120,000 words over the past 3+years.

Five years ago I never would have dreamed I would be someone who blogs. The concept in and of itself is so foreign to me. I’m a terribly private person, so the thought of putting my thoughts on the inter webs is actually terrifying. But I’ve done it. And I’m going to continue to do it.

And I want to share my secret recipe. The majority of what I write about can be boiled down to one simple thought. Are you ready?

What’s the leadership principle I can learn from this situation?

There you go. There’s my secret. Maybe I should trademark it.

From that thought, I have written a Day by Day in a Year calendar worths of posts. Some haven’t been so good. Some that I feel embarrassed to post, resonate the most.

But the question remains the same. I want to grow. I want to learn.

But more than that, I want YOU to grow. I want YOU to learn.

My greatest joy in writing here is not the way it helps me process past and present situations, but instead when I see how you interact with it. When you like, comment, share, reference it in a conversation, or shoot be a word of encouragement.

I cannot express how grateful I am for the time you give me to read my roughly 300 words twice a week. And my greatest desire is the time I spend will help you expand your leadership influence.

So if you’ve been with me for a while, thank you for sticking with me. If you’re new, consider subscribing to get this in your inbox, or liking the 3QL page on Facebook so you see posts as they arrive.

But at the end of the day, learn to ask yourself “what’s the leadership principle I can learn from this?” You never know what could happen as a result.

Houses But No Doors

So we have to decide: do we live with the creak? Do we ignore the issue, or is there something else we can do?

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We moved into our house a little over a year ago. Before we moved in, we had some work done-a minor remodel. One change was replacing a bi-fold door into our bedroom with a regular door.

Not long after moving in, one of the hinges developed a creak. Being the farm boy that I am, I grabbed some WD-40 and fixed it right away.

Then, over time, the creak developed again. So I repeated my solution. And it worked, for a little while. But the creak seems to always return.

Then I came to a realization. Sometimes the squeaky door hinge is just a squeaky door hinge. It doesn’t matter how much you do to fix it, eventually you’ll hear it’s whine again.

Leadership is similar. Sometimes the people who complain the loudest about one issue are going to be the ones who complain the loudest about the next issue. We can bend over backwards to try to make them happy on one issue, but the issue isn’t the problem.

So we have to decide: do we live with the creak? Do we ignore the issue, or is there something else we can do?

I don’t have an answer today. I’m sorry. I’m still figuring this out.

But here’s what I know. I’m not going to burn my house down because a door creaks. I’ll address issues that need to be addressed. I’ll ask myself if there are changes I need to make. I’ll make changes I need to make, then I’ll move forward with confidence.

And guess what, the only house that doesn’t have door creaks is a house with no doors. And the only leader who doesn’t hear complaints is a leader who has no one to lead.

Welcome to leading people. You can do this.

Three Struggles of Leadership Development

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I work in a world where the next “event” is always coming. There is always another lesson to prep, a service to plan, an event to brainstorm, and a calendar to create. There’s a frantic pace to what we do in churches.

That’s why over the years I’ve noticed something. As I started this blog back in 2017, I started to ask around about how my peers were developing student leaders. And do you know what I found?

Leadership development was an important part of what these incredible ministers wanted to do, but there were usually three things that held them back, and I think the same three things are true for all of us.

Developing Leaders is Important, but Not Critical.

The truth about leadership is that if I’m a good leader, then I can generally fake it until I make it. A strong leader can plan, execute, adapt, and perform in the moment. So if I’m capable, the temptation is to do everything myself. In fact, I might enjoy most of what I do, so it doesn’t always even feel like work. That means I may agree that developing leaders is important, but I can survive without it.

And so leadership development gets pushed down on the list somewhere between cleaning out the youth ministry closet and washing the church van. It’s something we know needs to be done, but it’s probably only going to happen occasionally.

Developing Leaders is Messy.

I mean, seriously, have you ever dealt with people? Some of them just wear you out. They have a different sense of humor, or a different set of priorities. They don’t prioritize the way you think they should. Some are just downright flaky.

Worse than all of that, sometimes after you invest in developing someone, they leave. All that time poured into them is now wasted because your organization doesn’t get the benefit.

I saw this happen in a previous position. As I helped students grow as leaders, their schedules became more and more packed because other people started to see their potential. As a result, the time I had with them to help them develop and grow was diminished.

Developing Leaders takes Time

Finally, one of the biggest struggles in developing leaders, whether it be students or adults, is the time investment. I can train a group of students in a workshop, but that limited investment doesn’t pay off fully without months and months of real life experience.

The same is true for me, and for you. I’m not the leader I was 10 years ago. I’m not the leader I was 5 years ago. I’m (hopefully) growing. I hope I’m taking steps so that I’m not the same leader I was 1 year ago.

How can I expect anything different from the students (and adults) I lead? Training take time. Developing leaders is more of a low and slow process, not microwave.

So, what’s your greatest struggle when it comes to developing those around you? What holds you back? What steps do you need to take today to move forward?

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This is Why

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Sometime last year I read through Michael Hyatt’s book Free to Focus. One of the takeaways for me was to establish a startup/shutdown routine for my work days. Being that I love routine, I’m still doing it, for the most part.

One adjustment I’ve made is to start my day with reading. When I sit down in my office, I pick up a book and read a couple pages, writing down quotes I want to remember. It’s been a pretty fun way to kickstart my day.

The book I’m currently reading is Jesus on Leadership. I bought it on a whim when a friend said they were reading it for a class, and it’s been one of the best impulse buys I’ve made since that pack of gum at the grocery store. Maybe even better.

This week, I came across this line:

To equip the church is to prepare its members to perform their part of the mission.

Gene Wilkes, Jesus on Leadership

And that’s why I want to develop leaders. I want to develop leaders, students and adults, who 1) are performing their part of the mission and 2) are developing others who are performing their part of the mission.

If you’re reading this, I’m writing this to you so that hopefully because of the dialogue we have, you can 1) perform your part of the mission and 2) develop others who are performing their part of the mission.

So, how are you performing your part of the mission? How are you developing others who are performing their part? Is there a step you need to take today?

I want you to grow because of the time I spend word vomiting my thoughts two mornings each week. Thank you for journeying with me. Let’s continue to grow our leadership influence.

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