Category: Incoherent Ramblings

How Big is the Obstacle in Front of You?

Speed bumps are not meant to stop us in our tracks. Speed bumps are meant to slow us down. In decision making, speed bumps are those things that give us hesitation, but ultimately cannot stop our momentum unless we choose to let them. Walls, on the other hand, stop us where we are. They prevent forward momentum. We can climb over a wall, or break it down, but it takes considerably more effort to do so.

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I issued a challenge to my daughter at the beginning of the year. A few weeks ago we started talking about the progress she has made (or not made). As she started listing some challenges that kept her from getting started, I saw an opportunity.

First, let me just say, I don’t spout leadership learning to my children every step of the way. I try to be very conscious of the sheer volume of information I impart on them, and the last thing I want is for them to grow deaf to my voice. But this opportunity was one of the times where I felt like I could speak up.

So, back to the pickup ride. She was listing all the possibilities and all the hang ups why those possibilities may not work. She wasn’t making excuses, but I could recognize some paralysis of analysis taking place. So I offered an image for her to consider: are these obstacles a speed bump or a wall?

Speed bumps are designed with one purpose: to slow people down. Now, you do have some wild people who use speed bumps as an opportunity to create a little havoc in their car, but most people slow down to an acceptable speed, or at least slow down while they swerve around the speed bumps.

Walls, on the other hand, are harder to navigate. Depending on height, location, purpose, construction, and other factors, walls don’t cause us to slow down, they cause us to stop. Very few people get to drive through walls, except for my brother-in-law who did that one time, on accident.

Speed bumps are not meant to stop us in our tracks. Speed bumps are meant to slow us down. In decision making, speed bumps are those things that give us hesitation, but ultimately cannot stop our momentum unless we choose to let them. Walls, on the other hand, stop us where we are. They prevent forward momentum. We can climb over a wall, or break it down, but it takes considerably more effort to do so.

In regards to the Three Questions, some people do not naturally ask the first question – What Needs to Be Done (Awareness). People who struggle with Awareness are faced with the choice as to whether they will allow the first question to be a speed bump or a wall. Will it be something they choose to push through, or will it be something that keeps them from making any progress whatsoever.

For others, the third question (Who Can I Get to Help – Leadership) is the most challenging. I fall into this category. I love accomplishing things, and feel terribly guilty when I ask others to help. So, if you’re like me, the decision we have to make is whether the third question becomes a speed bump that we push through and pass, or does it become a wall that stops us in our tracks.

Today, you’re going to face something you’re not excited about doing. You’re going to have a reason why you can’t or shouldn’t do something. Before you make your final decision, ask yourself this question: is this a speed bump or a wall? Then see what happens.

Growth is a Challenge

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Developing student leaders is a challenge.

It’s a challenge to balance the potential we see with the reality of the moment. But when we help a student realize and achieve that potential, it’s worth it.

It’s a challenge to convince a student that developing as a leader actually impacts their athletics. But when we help a student become a stronger leader on the court or field, it’s worth it.

It’s a challenge to watch a student wrestle with simple decisions because they are torn in so many directions. But when they take a leap and experience the difference, it’s worth it.

It’s a challenge when you have to learn a new personality and admit you had it wrong from the outset. But when they come out of their shell and reveal their talent and skill, it’s worth it.

It’s a challenge when a student doesn’t see the value in the basics of expanding their influence. But when they realize their actions speak louder than their commands, it’s worth it.

It’s a challenge when accountability is not well received. But when they grow from it, it’s worth it.

It’s a challenge when you invite a student to experience a new level of growth, and they politely turn you down. But when they are ready and accept the invitation, it’s worth it.

Ultimately, the greatest reward of developing student leaders isn’t in the easy moments, it’s in the moments that follow the struggle. I don’t know what challenge you’re facing or dealing with in this season, but know that when a student (or adult, for that matter) leans into developing their own leadership influence, it’s worth it.

Will You Carry the Burden?

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I’ve been blogging about leadership for the past 4+ years. While I think a lot of what I write has universal practical application, my burden is to challenge and equip youth ministers to challenge and equip students (and other adults) to become leaders.

I believe junior high and high school students are faced with incredible opportunities everyday to make a difference, but so many times they just don’t know what to do. I believe we have adults attending our churches who desperately want a place to serve, but they just don’t know what they can do. I believe we have people all around us who are simply waiting for permission to step up and lead.

But none of this happens if we as leaders don’t take our own personal leadership development seriously. I cannot lead someone where I have not been. I cannot challenge to step up and meet a need if I’m not practicing the same thing.

And so the ultimate challenge simply becomes: carry the burden. I will continue to encourage you to grow your leadership influence because I think until we learn to grow as leaders, we cannot encourage those around us to do the same.

But the action falls on you. Are you willing to put forth the effort to grow as a leader. When it’s not easy. When it’s lonely. When it’s challenging. When it’s exhausting. When it’s rewarding. When it’s easy. Are you willing to do what is necessary to grow as a leader and to lead those around you to do the same?

Say It Again and Again

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Have you ever gotten frustrated because you’ve had to repeat yourself? One of my biggest pet peeves is having to say the same thing over and over. But maybe, as I think about it, that’s a completely irrational pet peeve.

I write these posts for basically people that fall into one of two categories: 1) People, generally Youth Ministers, who desire to develop student leaders and value thought generation, and 2) People, generally Youth ministers, who want to grow their own leadership influence.

After doing this fairly consistently for 4+ years, much of what I write comes from in the moment experience. I see a situation I’m having to address in my own ministry or in my own leadership, and find a leadership principle to share. As a result, this blog becomes a time capsule of sorts-chronicling my own leadership journey and growth.

But even in the midst of the lessons and principles I try to extract from my current situations, there are a few ideas to which I always return.

And the redundancy of leadership may be one of my favorite and most central principles. I’ve written about it several times, which actually only makes sense. You can read some of those former posts here, here, and here.

But the idea is simple (and not original to me): Vision leaks. No one is as passionate about your mission and vision as you. As you seek to grow your leadership influence, impact your realm, and develop leaders around you, NO ONE is as passionate about your mission as you.

But there are people who are waiting to be invited into your mission. They want to help. They are begging to serve. But they need to be reminded.

And that’s where the redundancy of leadership comes in. Be prepared to repeat yourself. You’re going to have to do so. You are going to have to stand up time and time again and remind people of the target for which you’re aiming, because if you don’t help them know what to shoot for, they will pick their own target.

Few people love doing the same thing over and over and over and over and over. Redundancy gets a bad reputation because it’s boring. But redundancy is necessary.

So whatever vision you’re casting, whatever mission you’re trying to unite people around, whatever goal you’re striving for: Say it again and again.

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Will You Lean Into Momentum?

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One of the things that has shocked me was how old I was when I first read John Maxwell’s 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership. I’m ashamed to admit that it was only a couple years ago. As I read about each law, so many of them made sense, but a few went further than that.

For example, Law 16 is the Law of the Big Mo. Simply put, Maxwell says, momentum is a leader’s best friend.

I’ve spent a lot of time pondering this law lately. We are starting to see some momentum building in our ministry, and so I’ve been asking myself how I can make the most of the momentum we are sensing. Is there some way to take the momentum and curtail it into growth? Is there some way to replicate the momentum down the road? How long should I wait to act?

I’m starting to see momentum all around me. The way things progress and grow (momentum building). The way things slow down (momentum waning). The way I handle things in those moments–my response, my actions, my inaction.

So today I have two questions for you: Where is the momentum around you? And how can you make the most of the natural momentum you’re seeing?

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