Tag: Developing Students

Make a Difference

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Leadership can be a tricky reality. Some people are given a title that conveys leadership. Others earn respect and become leaders in their own right.

The focus here at 3 Question Leadership is much simpler, however. Having a title doesn’t pave the way to executing the 3 Questions. You don’t have to be the high man on the totem pole to assess what you can do and who you can get to help.

The bottom line is actually pretty simple: make a positive difference.

I see this in student ministry all the time. There are kids who are incredible leaders, except they lead the wrong way, making a negative difference.

But when a student sees the opportunity to step up, step out, and make a difference in a room, my heart leaps.

One of my personal goals is to influence a room every time I walk in. I know the skills I have, and I’m ready to put them to use whenever possible.

If we were to agree to focus on making a difference every time we walk into a new situation, what could change around us? Our job, undoubtedly, would start to look different. Our homes might begin to transform. The places we frequent (like restaurants, convenience stores, banks, etc.) could start to look different as well.

So, where are you making a difference? How are you impacting the situations you walk into? Is there a change you need to make? Pick one area, start small, and see what happens.

Keeping Vision Out Front

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A few weeks ago I met with my student leadership team. These kids have been walking with me through my 3 Question journey since August of 2016. The 3 Questions shape so much of what we do.

So I was somewhat surprised when I asked them to tell me the 3 Questions, and they struggled to answer.

Then, I had an epiphany: I’ve been blogging about the 3 Questions for the past 10 months, they haven’t.

In other words, the 3 Questions have become part of my everyday processing, but that doesn’t mean they had the same experience. They weren’t sitting down at a computer multiple times each week trying to write a blog related to the 3 Questions.

What’s the leadership lesson? Just because something is inherently important to you, does not guarantee it is inherently important to someone else. You have to keep vision out front.

You know what they say about assume? When we assume, we eventually have to exhume.

Well, nobody says that, but maybe they should. When we assume everyone else focuses on vision the way we do, we will soon find that vision being buried and forgotten.

So, what’s your next step? Ask yourself what you have been assuming everyone knows, but in reality needs to be brought back in front. You will feel like a broken record, but important things are worth repeating.

Don’t think of it as being a broken record; think of it as being a hit single set on repeat.

The Leadership Struggle

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I took a Sunday off last week for the first time in longer than I care to admit. But in so doing, I realized I am not doing a good job of answering the 3rd question (click here to read about the 3 questions–a framework for growing as a leader).

You see, I’m great at understanding what needs to be done and what I can do, but I struggle with inviting others to help along the way.

Thankfully, there were enough people willing to pick up the slack and learn before we left that everything went smoothly (life goes on with or without us!). But, I’m still left with a clear step moving forward: train others. Answer the 3rd question.

I’m actually pretty consistent with asking the 3rd question when it comes to things I struggle with doing, but something I really enjoy, like running the sound board, it’s a lot harder to hand off.

But if I want to allow other people to serve, if I want to develop people who are willing and capable of stepping up, then I have to learn to let go, even of the things I may enjoy doing. Who knows, I may find someone who has more passion than me and can do a better job!

What about you? How are you doing at answering the 3rd question? Are you able to put aside your personal enjoyment for the betterment of other people? What steps do you need to take to let go of something close to you to allow someone else to explore their calling?

Learn from Everything

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I try to make a habit of looking for a leadership lesson in every situation I find myself in. Do you do that?

When I go to sporting events, I find myself evaluating the psychology it takes to be an effective coach. Or, at a restaurant, I wonder about the training and communication it takes to establish a healthy work environment.

Now, I’m not always silently meditating on these things, but they are something that pops up nonetheless.

More recently, when things have not gone the way I think they should, I don’t criticize the people in the situation, but I beat myself up for not establishing a better culture.

This does two things: One it takes the pressure off the people I’m leading (right or wrong). Two, it puts the pressure back on me (right or wrong).

Part of my approach is cultivating a 3 Question mindset. If I watch something fail, or at the least go poorly, I immediately begin evaluating what needs to be done, what I could do, and who I could get to help. Sometimes I will have the opportunity to make the needed changes, other times I don’t.

I never want to be someone who sits by and criticizes, but rather someone who is willing to take the steps necessary to initiate change.

How are you at evaluating? Can you draw leadership lessons from a variety of situations? Are you at a point where you can answer the 3 Questions to make a situation better?

Leading by Letting Go

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I have what I would like to think of as a giving personality. I’m always willing to do something to help someone else. Well, usually.

But sometimes, my willingness to serve and to help may be the thing that prevents me from expanding my leadership influence.

Most areas where I serve, whether at church or somewhere else, my willingness to help may actually be harmful. My desire to equip those around me may actually be undercut by my desire to serve.

What about you? Are you someone who is willing to let go of something?

Think about it like this: I really enjoy running sound on a Sunday morning. Because of a few shifts in our congregation over the past year, I have gladly taken on a much larger role in the sound operation of a service. I have a few people who I have shown how to run sound, established some work-arounds to make it easier for someone else to do the job, but because I enjoy it, I haven’t fully let go.

This would be fine if I weren’t on staff, on stage, or regularly distracted by other responsibilities on a Sunday morning. So, what I’ve managed to do is handcuff anyone who might be willing to take a larger leading role.

So, what if I handed off that responsibility to someone else? What if I was willing to fully equip someone else to fulfill that need?

Are you unknowingly holding on to something in your ministry or at your work that might be holding those around you back? What do you need to let go of in order to let someone else shine?

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