Tag: perspective

How to Attack the Question Marks

My favorite time to do something is the second time.

The first time I do anything, I don’t know exactly what to expect. I don’t know how to anticipate what might go wrong. I don’t know the unwritten dynamics at play. I don’t know what I don’t know.

But once I can do something the first time, evaluation kicks into gear.

Here are three ways I’ve learned to attack the question marks.

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My favorite time to do something is the second time.

The first time I do anything, I don’t know exactly what to expect. I don’t know how to anticipate what might go wrong. I don’t know the unwritten dynamics at play. I don’t know what I don’t know.

But once I can do something the first time, evaluation kicks into gear. After going through the struggles of the first time, I know how to anticipate, how to adapt, and what areas need attention. And evaluating is where I feel like I’m at my best.

But before I get to the second time, I have to go through the first time. And in order to go through the first time, I have learned to acknowledge the questions I have about something, and to do my best to answer them. That’s what I call attacking the question marks.

For me, the unknown can be paralyzing. I’m not a planner, but I’m much more comfortable with a plan. So, in preparation, I have to lean into the questions I have as a source of inspiration, not a source of inaction.

Here are three ways I’ve learned to attack the question marks.

People I Know

In March of 2022 I decided it was time for me to start lifting weights, but I didn’t know where to start. The only time I’d ever lifted weights was in high school, so I had a lot of question marks. That’s where Brian came in. He had experience lifting, so we agreed to be gym buddies (that sounds legit, right?). He knew what he was doing so I borrowed his experience and insight as I started.

There’s a good chance whatever you’re about to tackle has been done by someone else. Not always, but usually. Who do you know that you can ask for wisdom/insight/advice? Write down the questions you have for them ahead of time and see what you can learn.

People I Don’t Know

I play guitar. I spend more time gathering knowledge on guitars. I spend even more time shopping for guitars. Not to buy, but to learn. But sometimes to buy.

Recently, I saw a guitar for sale for a decent price, but didn’t know much about it. So I went to the internet. I read posts about that guitar on message boards, watched videos, and did a little research from the manufacturer’s website. I attacked the question mark by using the insight and experience of others. I did not know anyone who owned one, so I had to broaden my search.

Often you’re going to come up on question marks that can’t be answered by people in your circle. Broaden out. Google it. Depending on the scope, there may be books that will help you work through it. But learn to borrow wisdom from people you don’t know as an avenue to attack the question marks.

Just Do The Thing

You might say I’m an information junkie. I like learning new things and about things. But sometimes, the best and most effective way to attack a question mark is to just do the thing. After all, if you’re like me and your favorite time is the second time, then get the first time over with!

What question mark is holding you back? How can you be a resource for someone else? Is there something in your life that just needs you to act? What are you waiting for?

Lessons from the Farm: Adapt for Progress

But at the end of the day, those transition moments were crucial. We had to pay attention and respond appropriately, knowing the long term goal superseded the immediate situation.

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Have you ever had a perfect plan until it came time to execute the plan? Mike Tyson is quoted as saying “Everyone has a plan until they get punched in the mouth.”

Have you seen this play out in your life?

Maybe you’re not a boxer. Okay, most of us aren’t boxers. But the premise is still true. Our plans can make all the sense in the world until we have to execute them.

First, a quick word. April at 3QL means I dig into my past and bring some leadership lessons from the farm. If you’re new, or if you’d just like a refresher, you can see some of the lessons from the farm posts from the past by clicking here, here, here, and here. Now, let’s move forward!

I saw this on the farm all the time. Last week I talked about moving cattle. Well, there’s one thing you need to know about cattle: there’s never a pre-meeting with the herd leader to determine the best, most efficient path.

Sometimes, when you move cattle, chaos ensues.

My dad had a draw (essentially a big ditch that has washed out over time) that runs through his land, separating a few of his fields. At one point specifically, the draw separates East/West and a county road separates North/South, creating a four corner situation with a 40 yard buffer in the middle running every direction.

If we wanted to move cattle across the road, it was simple enough. But if we want to move cattle across the draw, we could never predict which route was going to be taken.

That’s why we would discuss possible plans. Ideally we wanted the cattle to come out of the field and walk down the road across the draw, but it didn’t always work that way. Sometimes they would be moving fast enough that they would run across the road and we had to cross the draw at a different point. Sometimes they would go out of one gate and turn the opposite direction. And on occasion, they would take the most logical path.

But at the end of the day, those transition moments were crucial. We had to pay attention and respond appropriately, knowing the long term goal superseded the immediate situation.

The same is true for leadership. As you lead, you are going to get a sense of the direction and destination. Thankfully you work with people and not cattle, so you can discuss this. But please understand, everyone has a plan until they have to execute the plan.

The best plans on paper don’t always translate. So you have to learn to adapt in the moment. Remember, transition moments are crucial. Pay attention and respond appropriately, knowing that the long term goal supersedes the immediate situation. Take the time to adapt and move forward.

Lessons from the Farm: Save the Drama

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Well, here we are again. April at 3QL means I dig into my past and bring some leadership lessons from the farm. If you’re new, or if you’d just like a refresher, you can see some of the lessons from the farm posts from the past by clicking here, here, here, and here. Now, let’s move forward!

A regular part of raising cattle was “moving” cattle, or a cattle drive. To put it simply, we would try to round up all the cattle in one field and move them collectively to another one. This in itself is an art form to say the least, and one I took a while to fully learn and understand.

On one of my early “drives” my imagination got the best of me. The field we were moving cattle out of had a draw on one side. The draw provided a steep ledge, and cattle could only navigate it in certain spots, which meant it provided a good boundary for one side of the herd.

Except in my mind, I envisioned a stampede of cattle running off the ledge, just like in the cartoons.

As the herd began moving toward the draw, I snapped into action to head them off and save them from the impending death that awaited them. And I was successful. The herd not only turned, they split up. It was no longer one large group moving in the same direction, but now multiple groups going all sorts of ways.

Cue the superhero music.

Except, my heroic actions actually caused more problems than solutions.

Sometimes in leadership, we create problems where they don’t exist and successfully kill any momentum or progress being made. All in the name of being the hero.

The people you lead don’t need a hero. They need someone with a goal.

Be steady today. Understand the goal and help to make sure you move in the right direction.

This Might Be the Best Hidden Gem I’ve Found

Yesterday I stumbled onto a podcast interview with Doug Franklin, founder of Leadertreks.org, and it was solid gold.

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TLDR; Click here for a phenomenal interview on student ministry.

A few years ago I remember having a conversation with a friend who was a faithful reader of this blog. She constantly affirmed me when I needed it, but she was also honest (which was even better). I’m chuckling to myself this morning remembering one comment she made.

“Yeah, when you do your podcast week, I kind of just check out.”

And that was the end of my annual podcast week. Probably for good reason.

But today is an exception. Yesterday I stumbled onto a podcast interview with Doug Franklin, founder of Leadertreks.org, and it was solid gold.

I’m not going to wax eloquently about it, but if you’re in student ministry, take the time to listen to it. As a 19 year ministry veteran, I found myself consistently nodding my head in agreement, amazed at the insight Doug brought to the discussion.

If you’re not in student ministry, but are invested in the health of student ministers you know, Doug provides some incredible insight for you as well!

Enough talking. Here’s the link to the Total Ministry Makeover podcast Bonus episode with Doug Franklin.

What If We’re Not Satisfied?

you do, how you do it, and when you do it. Sometimes what you do works in your favor, but other times it doesn’t.

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There’s a chance that what follows is something only I deal with, but I’m putting it out there just in case.

Do you ever feel like your habits and routines fall into the space inside of a rubber band? You do what you do, how you do it, and when you do it. Sometimes what you do works in your favor, but other times it doesn’t.

Take for example your eating habits. You eat what you eat for whatever reason (there’s a lot of psychology behind your eating habits and decisions, by the way). You go through life and have seasons where you decide it’s time to lose weight, so you try to change your eating habits. You stretch the rubber band, so to speak. But in trying to change your eating habits, you don’t really change the habits, you change what you eat. Then eventually it’s as though the rubber band snaps back to the original shape. It may be a week, a month, six months, two years (you get the point).

But eventually the rubber band snaps back. You’re back to your old habits because you never really broke the habits, you just paused them.

Just me? Well, even so, I’ll keep going.

What if you learned to break the rubber band? You see, when we break the rubber band, there’s no going back. We change our mindset about who we really are and don’t let the shape and elasticity of the rubber band define us.

This is possible. John Maxwell calls it the Law of the Lid. As you grow (raise the lid), things start to change.

Four years ago I broke the rubber band on my morning routine. Sure, there are times where I may try to tape it back in it’s original shape, but at the end of the day, I know I have a new reality.

What rubber band do you need to break in your life? Does it have to do with a mindset that limits your leadership? Is it your diet? Is it the people you allow to speak into your life? Is it your nightly routine, or your morning routine?

Chances are something needs to give. So go ahead, break the rubber band. Change your mindset and see what happens. Awaken that piece of you that has been waiting.

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