Tag: student ministry

Learn and Grow

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Short post today, but I’ve been thinking a lot lately about mistakes and mishaps. I blog on this regularly, partly because it’s a fear of mine.

I fear mistakes. I fear a mistake means I’m not good enough. I fear a mistake means I’m not valuable.

Ultimately, I don’t fear failure. I fear surrendering to failure. Until I learn to reframe my fear, I will never be able to grow.

Great leaders know failure is part of life. So take that step today. Have that conversation that may not go your way. Learn from it and grow.

Current Reads

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I read a really good post from Carey Nieuwhof at the end of last week on 12 books every leader must read. Feel free to click over and check it out.

I thought today I’d share a few books I’m reading through at the moment.

  • Growing Young – I looked up not long ago and realized I haven’t read a youth ministry related book in a while, so I texted a trusted friend and asked for a recommendation. He suggested this one, so it’s on my kindle being digested at the moment. It’s also free thanks to my Kindle Unlimited subscription!
  • Free to Focus – With a job transition, I thought I would try to make the most of the momentum and bought this book when it released not long ago. It’s one of the first books where I’ve worked through it chapter by chapter, actually completing the assignments at the end, which also means I abandoned the audio version for the kindle edition.
  • How to Lead When You’re Not in Charge – Speaking of audio books, I picked this one up on a sale a few months back and am working my way through it. The author actually read it, and has a unique delivery on some aspects. The content is solid, and I’m thoroughly enjoying it.
  • The Miracle Morning – I hesitate to write much about this because I took a back door approach to it (I actually read the version for writers to get introduced to the concepts), but the impact is there nonetheless. I’ll just say it’s been a game changer for me.

I’ve written about this before, but I tend to have book ADD. I have a difficult time sticking with a book once I start, but it’s a discipline I’m working to develop.

So, what about you? What books are you reading? I’d love to hear, so comment below!

Defining Small Town & Leadership

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One of the things that fascinates me is listening to people talk about small towns. In Texas, we have our fair share of small towns. But here’s the tricky thing: not everyone shares the definition of a “small town.”

Don’t believe me, try it. If I were to walk up to people in my current town of 23,000 and ask if they think we are living in a small town, I think many would say yes.

If you ask me, my answer would be different. This is actually the second largest town I’ve ever lived in, and I grew up in a town of 500. And no, that’s not a typo–there are only two zeroes after that five.

So, which is right? Is 500 a small town, or is 23,000 a small town? Can they both be small towns? At 500 are you supposed to change it from town to village? Is 23,000 a small city? Is it a large town?

Here lies one of the biggest struggles I see in leadership time and again – a lack of shared definitions. We get in a room with a group of people and start talking about a subject, presuming agreement on basic terms, and realize (or sometimes don’t) we are talking apples and oranges.

Have you ever asked a group of people what “deep” means? Chances are in a group of five people, you’ll get six different answers (how’s that for deep?).

Or, how about the way you express emotions. I would say I’m more reserved and intense, but to some people that comes across as detached and angry. I have had times where I thought I was having a wonderful discussion with someone only to find out later our relationship was negatively affected because of our lack of shared definitions.

Learning to navigate the tricky waters of varied definitions provides a very difficult challenge for leadership. But until we get people on the same page, you will find very often the battles you face find their roots in this principle.

What struggles or battles are you facing because of a lack of shared definitions? What adjustments can you make to get on the same page moving forward? Are you willing to do it?

Lessons from the Farm: Know the Weight

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Today we are continuing our Lessons from the Farm series. You can click to see some of the previous posts that deal with learning when to stop, when to keep going, perspective, and working until the job is done.

Have you ever passed a cattle truck on the highway? Have you ever thought about how much weight is on the truck?

Or how about a grain truck?

Maybe you don’t know the difference between the two. A truck is a truck, right?

Well, let me let you in on a secret: every truck driver hauling a load of cattle is interested in how much weight they are hauling for several reasons, but one in particular: because there are a group of people on the highways who are very interested in how much weight a cattle truck is hauling.

That group of people are so interested, in fact, they are willing to stop a truck and weigh it themselves. Sometimes, they will even use the red and blue lights on top of their vehicles to assist in pulling the truck over.

There are laws as to how much weight a truck can weigh. So, lighter trailers are worth more because you haul more weight if your starting weight is lower.

These are all things the average person will never know. These are all things I still don’t fully understand. But someone in charge of an operation is heavily invested in not getting a fine for having too large of a load.

As a leader, you may not get pulled over to check the weight, but there are things you need to know (and care about) that other people will never consider. Things like organizational health, relational health, growth metrics, attendance, and engagement.

As a leader, in fact, your investment into these factors should be significantly higher. Understanding key metrics about your ministry (or business) will make you a better leader.

I’ve written about this before, but leadership needs to be intentional. We make decisions to move in a direction, otherwise we drift aimlessly. Intentional leadership means we are aiming at something. It doesn’t mean we are stuck aiming at the same thing for years to come, but we are aiming at something.

So, what are you looking at in your ministry to help you know the weight on the trailer? What are your metrics for success? Is it program attendance? Is it volunteer engagement? Is it the financial bottom line? Camp signups?

Take some time today to work through this, if you haven’t already. Learn the weight limits you have, and grow your leadership influence.

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The Simplicity of 3QL

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The genesis of my blogging adventure began with a simple concept: sharing three questions I started teaching students leaders to ask and answer in an attempt to expand their leadership influence.

If you’re new to 3QL, I would encourage you to go check out the Foundation to see a short summary of the namesake for this endeavor. Go ahead, this post will wait for you.

The abbreviated version boils down to this: When you walk into a room (or encounter a situation in general), ask yourself…

  1. What needs to be done? (Awareness)
  2. What can I do? (Willingness)
  3. Who can I get to help? (Leadership)

Lately I’ve been reflecting on the simplicity of the questions. Asking and answering the questions opens doors we could never imagine, but the three questions are also counter intuitive.

One of the easiest lies to buy into is that leadership belongs to those at the front (of the line, of the organization, of the room). But we all have seen the impact someone can have on a room from a seat that’s not the front.

So leadership is not limited to the front. John Maxwell’s second law of leadership is “The Law of Influence: The True Measure of Leadership is Influence – Nothing More, Nothing Less.” When we grow our influence, we grow our leadership.

The same is true in Youth Ministry (and life in general). When we teach students (or anyone) to ask and answer the three questions, what we are doing is preparing them to make an impact where they are.

If you’re reading this today, let me issue a challenge. A student doesn’t have to pay dues before having influence. Granted, there are benefits to life experience, but the gamble we take in Youth Ministry is waiting too long to provide leadership opportunities.

Don’t wait. Develop leaders regardless of their age. You never know what may happen. Pour into your older students, but also be willing to pour into and invest in your younger students as well. When you build a balance, you’ll be amazed at the difference you’ll begin to notice.

And if you’re not sure where to start, get a group of students with hearts of a servant, teach them the three questions, and ask them how they answered the questions. You’ll be amazed at what begins to happen.

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