Category: Incoherent Ramblings

3 Shifts to Make to Unlock Your Leadership Growth, Part 3

Mistakes bother me. Especially mistakes I make that could have been avoided. But that leads us to our next point: Evaluated Mistakes Unleash Growth

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How have you grown in your leadership capacity over the past month? The past six months? The past year?

Growth isn’t always immediately noticeable. But I really hope you can look back at the past twelve months and point out how you have grown. Maybe you added an arrow to your quiver, like moving conversations from surface to something more using intentional questions. Maybe you’ve spent more time pouring into someone. Maybe you’ve swung for the fences and learned something along the way.

Today we are looking at part 3 of a three part series. You can check out part 1 and part 2 to catch up.

Let’s get vulnerable for a moment. Mistakes bother me. Especially mistakes I make that could have been avoided. But that leads us to our next point:

Evaluated Mistakes Unleash Growth

Some situations require swinging for the fences, only to strike out and learn from the misfire. Mistakes don’t mean failure. Unevaluated mistakes mean failure.

Did you catch that? Once again, evaluation makes the difference. I am constantly amazed at what growth can be unlocked when we learn to evaluate our mistakes.

But that means we have to make mistakes. Not mistakes of ignorance, but mistakes of innovation.

A mistake of ignorance is making a mistake when you should have known better. Going to a Mexican food restaurant and binging chips and salsa when you’re trying to cut carbs, for example. Or planning an event without checking the necessary calendars, again.

But mistakes of innovation are mistakes made when trying something new. You plan an event you haven’t done before, or introduce a new emphasis for a season. Sometimes these things work really well, sometimes they flop.

Ultimately, mistakes provide an opportunity for evaluation, which in turn will unleash growth.

I’m going to guess you’re in one of two camps: you’re like me and cautiously move forward, rarely making mistakes, but also not innovating very well, OR you repeat mistakes over and over. I guess you could be in a third place and have this nailed down, to which I cheer you on.

But no matter where you find yourself, what’s your action step going to be? Do you need to do some evaluating? Do you need to take a risk on something? How can you improve? How have you learned from a recent mistake?

Make These Three Decisions Today To Unlock Your Leadership

We all face an abundance of decisions during the day. Some of those are as simple as what to wear, what to eat, when to eat and so on. But some decisions take a little more intentionality and thought.

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We all face an abundance of decisions during the day. Some of those are as simple as what to wear, what to eat, when to eat and so on. But some decisions take a little more intentionality and thought.

Today I would like to share with you a simple framework to help you unlock your leadership throughout your day. These are not the end all questions, but they do put us in a place where we are willing to meet the needs that arise around us.

  1. Is This A Situation Where I Need To Be First? Sometimes we meet an opportunity and find ourselves waiting for the response of others. But what if you need to be first? Be the first to send the text or email, to make the phone call, to start the conversation, to acknowledge the problem, or to meet the need? Sometimes leadership is as simple as making the first move and letting people around us respond accordingly. Where do you need to be first today?
  2. Is This A Situation Where I Need To Be Second? A few years back I was shown this video, and it has stuck with me. Every leader needs someone who will respond to their leadership. That includes people with whom you work. Maybe the best leadership move you can make today is to be the first person to go second, thus validating an idea or project. Where do you need to be second today?
  3. Is This A Situation Where I Need To Be Last? I am the type of person who hates to leave, so I always find myself hanging around to the end. But being last isn’t just waiting, it’s serving until the end. Be the last person working, the last person making effort or progress. Being last means you’re setting the tone for what finishing really looks like.

My theory is you do one, maybe two, of these really well. Maybe you like to take charge, or maybe you naturally respond to the leadership of someone else. Great. I’m glad you know that about yourself.

Now, push yourself a little further. Unlock your leadership and push yourself to work on the others. Which of these decisions does not come naturally, and how can you lean into that decision today?

How to Attack the Question Marks

My favorite time to do something is the second time.

The first time I do anything, I don’t know exactly what to expect. I don’t know how to anticipate what might go wrong. I don’t know the unwritten dynamics at play. I don’t know what I don’t know.

But once I can do something the first time, evaluation kicks into gear.

Here are three ways I’ve learned to attack the question marks.

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My favorite time to do something is the second time.

The first time I do anything, I don’t know exactly what to expect. I don’t know how to anticipate what might go wrong. I don’t know the unwritten dynamics at play. I don’t know what I don’t know.

But once I can do something the first time, evaluation kicks into gear. After going through the struggles of the first time, I know how to anticipate, how to adapt, and what areas need attention. And evaluating is where I feel like I’m at my best.

But before I get to the second time, I have to go through the first time. And in order to go through the first time, I have learned to acknowledge the questions I have about something, and to do my best to answer them. That’s what I call attacking the question marks.

For me, the unknown can be paralyzing. I’m not a planner, but I’m much more comfortable with a plan. So, in preparation, I have to lean into the questions I have as a source of inspiration, not a source of inaction.

Here are three ways I’ve learned to attack the question marks.

People I Know

In March of 2022 I decided it was time for me to start lifting weights, but I didn’t know where to start. The only time I’d ever lifted weights was in high school, so I had a lot of question marks. That’s where Brian came in. He had experience lifting, so we agreed to be gym buddies (that sounds legit, right?). He knew what he was doing so I borrowed his experience and insight as I started.

There’s a good chance whatever you’re about to tackle has been done by someone else. Not always, but usually. Who do you know that you can ask for wisdom/insight/advice? Write down the questions you have for them ahead of time and see what you can learn.

People I Don’t Know

I play guitar. I spend more time gathering knowledge on guitars. I spend even more time shopping for guitars. Not to buy, but to learn. But sometimes to buy.

Recently, I saw a guitar for sale for a decent price, but didn’t know much about it. So I went to the internet. I read posts about that guitar on message boards, watched videos, and did a little research from the manufacturer’s website. I attacked the question mark by using the insight and experience of others. I did not know anyone who owned one, so I had to broaden my search.

Often you’re going to come up on question marks that can’t be answered by people in your circle. Broaden out. Google it. Depending on the scope, there may be books that will help you work through it. But learn to borrow wisdom from people you don’t know as an avenue to attack the question marks.

Just Do The Thing

You might say I’m an information junkie. I like learning new things and about things. But sometimes, the best and most effective way to attack a question mark is to just do the thing. After all, if you’re like me and your favorite time is the second time, then get the first time over with!

What question mark is holding you back? How can you be a resource for someone else? Is there something in your life that just needs you to act? What are you waiting for?

What If We’re Not Satisfied?

you do, how you do it, and when you do it. Sometimes what you do works in your favor, but other times it doesn’t.

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There’s a chance that what follows is something only I deal with, but I’m putting it out there just in case.

Do you ever feel like your habits and routines fall into the space inside of a rubber band? You do what you do, how you do it, and when you do it. Sometimes what you do works in your favor, but other times it doesn’t.

Take for example your eating habits. You eat what you eat for whatever reason (there’s a lot of psychology behind your eating habits and decisions, by the way). You go through life and have seasons where you decide it’s time to lose weight, so you try to change your eating habits. You stretch the rubber band, so to speak. But in trying to change your eating habits, you don’t really change the habits, you change what you eat. Then eventually it’s as though the rubber band snaps back to the original shape. It may be a week, a month, six months, two years (you get the point).

But eventually the rubber band snaps back. You’re back to your old habits because you never really broke the habits, you just paused them.

Just me? Well, even so, I’ll keep going.

What if you learned to break the rubber band? You see, when we break the rubber band, there’s no going back. We change our mindset about who we really are and don’t let the shape and elasticity of the rubber band define us.

This is possible. John Maxwell calls it the Law of the Lid. As you grow (raise the lid), things start to change.

Four years ago I broke the rubber band on my morning routine. Sure, there are times where I may try to tape it back in it’s original shape, but at the end of the day, I know I have a new reality.

What rubber band do you need to break in your life? Does it have to do with a mindset that limits your leadership? Is it your diet? Is it the people you allow to speak into your life? Is it your nightly routine, or your morning routine?

Chances are something needs to give. So go ahead, break the rubber band. Change your mindset and see what happens. Awaken that piece of you that has been waiting.

What’s Your Growth Plan?

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I’ve been spending some time recently thinking about what it takes to grow. On occasion I will ask someone this question and won’t get much of a response.

I think everyone wants to grow, but growth rarely happens without intentionality. Unless it’s weight gain. So let’s take a step toward intentionality today.

What are you doing to grow? Do you have a written plan? Do you have a mental plan? Do you have practices in place to help?

If you were to create a written plan to grow, like a workout routine or training regimen, what would it look like?

Here’s mine:

  1. Books. I’m not an avid reader, but I’m trying to become better at it. I’ve read more books in the past three years than I had read in the previous 15. I listen to a large number of books, but I’ve also learned that I retain better when I actually see the words. I also know that I retain better when I read a book as part of a group, so I’ve participated in a few “book clubs” over the past couple of years.
  2. Podcasts. I listen to talk more than music, so I have a few key podcasts that are must listens and a few that I return to every so often because they challenge me in my leadership development. This isn’t always easy, but it helps stimulate my mind for sure.
  3. Evaluation. A blank whiteboard or yellow pad is my love language. I love dreaming about what could be in the context of what is. Am I doing a good job? How can I grow? What can I change to make something better? What am I forgetting?

I don’t have a written plan, but I will by the end of this week. If our leadership growth is important (Is it worth it?) and we are willing (Am I willing to grow?), then the time it takes to chart the course matters.

Let me challenge you to do the same, and share it with me! We are better when we grow together.

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